Where Do I Fit In?

I've been watching a lot of 19 Kids and Counting lately ( I just love reality tv), and I've also been keeping up on the Ordain Women events and drama (Facebook is booming with it all). And between the two of them, a huge question has come to mind:

Where do I fit in as a women in the church, as a women in a family, as a women at a University, as a women in a job, as a women in this society? Where do I fit in?


The Duggar family from 19 Kids and Counting is very conservative. I'm conservative too, so I agree with a lot of their values, ideas, and so on. However, I do feel like there's a lot of gender stereotypes within this family. The girls cook and do most of the cleaning, and the boys do the outside work and car stuff. They like it that way. I understand a lot of the stereotypes, but I don't want to be the only one cooking and cleaning my life away. . .

And then there are feminists that believe women are oppressed. We should be treated better, we should be getting more, we deserve it. Ordain Women is an organization that believes women in the LDS church should have the priesthood (among other things). Some of the feminist ideals click with me, other ones do not.

So, as a women, what do I want?

I am different than a man. Physically, of course, but I do believe there are some other differences. That book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus isn't entirely inaccurate. In my opinion, anyway. I want to be treated equally with men, but I don't want to be treated the same.

I work with six men, and I'm the only girl. Sometimes, I want them to tone down their language or inappropriate jokes. Is that because I'm a girl, or because I just feel uncomfortable as a person? I'm a pretty good cook. Is that because I'm a girl, or because I like to cook? I love wearing dresses. Is that because I'm a girly girl, or because they're comfortable and I think their fun?

I don't want to be the same as a man. I like being a girl. I like that girls are different than men. I don't want to be treated less than a man, but I don't want to be treated better than a man either. Well, maybe I want to be treated better, but that's a little unfair in any case. If we treated women and men the exact same, would chivalry be dead?

It's confusing for me.

I'm having a feminine identity crisis.