it's not a girl crush!

Today I wanna blog about a girl that I talk about a lot...
but it's not because I have a girl crush on her!
I have a girl crush on Katy Perry...mayyyyybe Emma Stone,
but anyway, her name is Bri.
I've mentioned her in many posts
(here, here, and here)
She did a guest post,
I wrote about her in my "Delighted :)" page,
and she's the one with the big black and white button on the sidebar.
okay...it sounds a lil' girl crushy, but it's not!!
So, why Kolie?
Why do you talk about this girl so flippin much?
Well, it's because she's basically the nicest person ever.
And I will tell you why.
This is a really hard time in my life.
I have no money, I feel down on my appearance, family nonsense, bleh blah bleh, but she continually does nice things for me AND Tay day after day!
Our awkward sister pic. haha :)

She drove us the half hour to Tay and Ryan's (her husby) work two days in a row!
She took me shopping and helped me find a cute outfit..ALL about me!
She took pictures of Tay and I for engagements!
She lets me borrow her clothes!
Yesterday, she hosted the CUTEST bridal shower for me!
There were TONS of cute decorations and games!
She got me an adorable gift!
She's just..amazing!
And I don't know how to repay her.
 Before I met her, there were a TON of misconceptions about her...
I was intimidated by her amazingly cute sense of style, and I thought she hated me :)
She didn't.
She's so so nice, and people made me think she wasn't...
It was incredibly lame :(

Dear Bri,
I am EXCITED as all get out to be your sister.
You deserve the best!
I'm so glad to have met you :)
Your future little sis.

More pictures she took of me and Tay :)


Simple Pleasures

You know the times in life where it gets really really hard to think of the good?
And you sit around wondering 
"When do I get a break??"
That kind of time.
And everyone goes through that at least once.
Haha, some of us get to go through it a lot more than once.
But that's okay.
It helps to see the simple pleasures.
Taylor and I bought a plant.
It's a really big, really pretty plant.
It's a mixture of our favorite colors!
White and Purple.
It's gorgeous.
But a while ago, it started to die.
There were only 2 blossoms left when I asked Taylor,
"Is it okay if we pray for our plant?"
Without hesitating, Taylor said a prayer.
It went something like this:
Please help our plant to grow.
Please help it to receive the nourishment it need to be healthy.
We are so so sorry for not taking care of it like we should.
Help us to know how to make it live again.
Help us to know what to do to help it grow again.
We ask for this small blessing, please.

The next day, our plant was still dead.
And the next day.
And the next day.
I was getting quite discouraged.
We were watering it every day, why won't our prayer be answered?
 I decided to move it to a sunnier spot..maybe it needs more sun.
And we watered it even more...maybe it needs more water.
And now, well, there's a lot of blossoms.
 And I learned something very valuable,
You can't just standby and wait for things to work out.
You gotta work for it.
You gotta try new things,
try different things,
figure things out.
 God helps those who help themselves.


Blogger Block

I don't actually have blogger block.
I'm just going to talk about blogger block.
I know you appreciate the alliteration!
I lost my first follower....
I was kind of sad.
I mean, I only had 42
(Luckily a special nice person started following me the next day, so I didn't feel too sad for long)
But it got me to thinking.
Why? Why, person, did you stop following me?
Am I too mean?
Lately, I've noticed that my posts have been a little mean.
Am I boring?
I could see that. I don't have a cute weekly thing, or sponsor thing, or anything.
Am I ugly?
I can do less pictures of myself!
(that one was mostly a fishing question...fishing for compliments ;) )
I need to reach out to other bloggers!
Sponsor posts!

I digress.

Alls I'm sayin is that maybe I don't have blogger block in that I don't know what to post about.
I think I may have blogger block in that I don't know what to blog about.
You get me?

A bit of a problem, don't you think?
I would hate to be the bleh blog.
Oh well! 
I will be a blogger to blog.

Side note!
My Mommy got a new do'!


i'm in love with a thief

Bri, Ryan, Tay, and I all hit up

Utah has a lot of "days"
Onion days
Pleasant Family Days
Lavender Days
Pioneer Days
But I love love LOVE Strawberry Days!
Mostly because of strawberries and cream :)
The most delicious thing...out of a lot of delicious things!
And I don't even like strawberries!!
Anyway, there's lots of events and such, but we just went to the Carnival.
Tay has NEVER been to a carnival!
A deprived child, I know haha :)
But more than anything, he wanted to win me something!
Wellllll! He did!
I know, the lighting is weird as all get out.
 He won the dog by getting a slam-dunk! 
Super cool!
But he won that disgusting frog by dominating at the balloon darts. 
This is where we have a story of a true carnie.
The guy said that the more balloons Tay popped, the bigger the prize will be.
He popped all of them!
And the guy pulled out this ugly frog from a bin full of beanie baby things, and one giraffe.
"I thought I got a big prize.."
"You have to pop three more"
"oh, okay, but I'm not paying again. You said I got a big prize."
"You have to pay again."
"Well, can I have a different small prize?"
"from this bin."
"Okay, then I want the giraffe"
"You have to play again for that."
"It's in the bin."
"I don't know how it got there"
So we left with this ugly frog.
Tay despises frogs.
And I love giraffes.
We were pretty bummed we got gypped.

There's a giraffe in this pic.
Well, my lovebird sprinted to the booth while the mean carnie wasn't looking,
swapped the nasty frog for our rightful prize,
and sprinted away.
And I love him.




Yesterday was friday.
No duh.
Bri went shopping with me and I got some help for dressing my curvy body in a modest way!
Check it!!
(the cute clothes, not the weird face)
Cute right??
And the shoes...
Super cute. 
It was fun shopping with Bri.
She's like a whole different breed of person.
I'm the shopping mutt, and she's the highly trained, pure-bred, showdog.
We got like 40 different pieces of clothing!
Try on, approve/disapprove, take off, sort, sort, sort. done.
That's how shopping is SUPPOSED to be done.
I really like my new clothes and hope to get $$ so I can get more!
(this is where the I REALLY NEED A JOB thing comes in.)
Anyway, so after that funness, my lovely Tay decided to splurge and take me to the movie, Brave.
We got there an hour early and laid on the floor til they would seat us :)
  It was a great movie, and get this!
So, we don't have a ton of money right now and we were pretty full so we opted to not get popcorn.
But here's something you should know about me.
I freaking LOVE popcorn!
It is BY FAR my favorite food!
Especially kettle corn!!!
So, we finally got seated, and although I was okay with our decision to save money, I secretly wanted popcorn SOOOOOOOOOO bad.
While we were waiting for the movie to begin, Taylor started complaining of a stomach ache.
:( Poor baby.
So, he went off to the bathroom to be sick and whatnot :/
I continued to watch the dumb pre-preview garbage, when some guy with popcorn and soda tried to take Tay's seat!
H no, he's not!
I turned to give the guy a piece of my mind! Ya know, tell him get the heck away from my love's seat!
(aka sorry, this seat is saved :( )
But it wasn't some random guy!
It was MY guy!
With popcorn!!!
I love him.
I love popcorn.
I love him.
He said he knew I couldn't live without it.
You bet I can't!
    What a wonderful friday :)


I'm Curvy.

First, and foremost, please check out this post from my very-soon-to-be-sis-in-law.
Yeah, she's awesome.
And now I wanna write a similar post, but I don't want to steal her idea.
SO, I'll steal it tomorrow when it's less obvious!
(Bri's probably calling me a nerd right now)

Anyway, so today I'll post about something different.
Something I discovered while Bri was very kindly taking engagements for us :)
What is it you may ask?
I'm curvy.

This is my body's evolution:
And I don't know how to be curvy!
I also don't know how to dress modestly AND cute,
so basically,
my mind is blown.
I know that I'll get it eventually.
And Bri is MORE than willing to help me,
which is a Godsend, because just Look at her!

Until I have money to spend on clothes though,
I'll just have to deal.
But it's tough.
The last time I was this size...well I didn't have curves with it.
And so now, it's a little disheartening.
Because like zillions and zillions of other girls...
I feel a lil' chunky.
It's just this crazy difference.
I was once a size 2, and now I'm verging on an 8.
What's wrong with 8?
Check these facts out.
- Twenty years ago the average fashion model weighed 8% less than the average woman. Today, she weighs 23% less.

- Ten years ago plus-size models averaged between size 12 and 18. Today the need for size diversity within the plus-size modeling industry continues to be questioned. The majority of plus-size models on agency boards are between a size 6 and 14, while the customers continue to express their dissatisfaction.

- Most runway models meet the Body Mass Index physical criteria for Anorexia.

- 50% of women wear a size 14 or larger, but most standard clothing outlets cater to sizes 14 or smaller.

Anyway, so hopefully I won't get too down.
Because I shouldn't.
And I'm sure Taylor doesn't like it.
He says he doesn't like "skinny girls"
So there you go.
How do you feel about all this?
What's your opinions?
Love ya!
Look at us taking on the world!!!
PPS You love the pictures, don't you?



Dear Dad,
Happy Father's Day.
I love you so so much.
I'm so proud of you for everything that you have done.
I'm so grateful that I have you in my life.
You're amazing.
Thank you for playing with me,
for helping me when I'm struggling,
for hugs and kisses,
for supporting me,
for making silly jokes,
for taking me camping and letting me ride on the back of your atv,
for carrying me inside when I was little and sleeping,
for watching all sorts of movies with me,
for always loving me.

With so much love, your daughter,


Bread Winner

This is my bread winner.
He's pa-retty good lookin' if I say so myself.
I like not being the bread winner...kinda.
I like not constantly worrying about money:
how much we have
how much we need
how much we've spent
You may say
But, Kolie! You should be MORE worried about all that because now you have less money!
But for some reason, when I'm not working 40 hours a week, I feel less responsible for what goes on.
That may be bad.
But Taylor says "we'll be okay," and I believe him.
I DON'T like being so "useless" though
Taylor says he "only needs my smile,"
buuuuuut my wallet thinks he's exaggerating just a lil' teeny tiny bit.
My past two interviews ended in a big, steaming, pile of nothing.
But I keep sending out my resume, and I have another one on Monday!
If Taylor were a photographer...
And if I don't get it...
You will know.
Because I will be sad.
On the bright side!
My dress alterations are FREE, because my Grandpa is a sewing machine mechanic and traded a kind woman his services for my alterations :)
Also! I found extensions for only $12 , thanks to a giftcard I had!
Alllllso, my future sis-in-law gave me a free fresh water pearl necklace, ice cream cone, and pedicure!!!!
People rock.


Timeless Love

Holy Smack.
Can't people just like us?
Taylor and I seem to hit wall after wall with people, money, and...everything else!
Does this go away when we're married?
Probably not.
Except maybe people will stop getting mad at us for spending so much time together.
I wish we had money.
I wish people didn't judge us.
I wish I had a job.
I wish...a lot of things.
But Silverstein has something to say about that.

Lester was given a magic wish
By the goblin who lives in the banyan tree,
And with his wish he wished for two more wishes--
So now instead of just one wish, he cleverly had three.
And with each one of these
He simply wished for three more wishes
Which gave him three old wishes, plus nine new.
And with each of these twelve
He slyly wished for three more wishes,
Which added up to forty-six--or is it fifty-two?
Well anyway, he used each wish
To wish for wishes 'til he had
Five billion, seven million, eighteen thousand thirty-four.
And then he spread them on the ground
And clapped his hands and danced around
And skipped and sang, and then sat down
And wished for more.
And more...and more...they multiplied
While other people smiled and cried
And loved and reached and touched and felt.
Lester sat amid his wealth
Stacked mountain-high like stacks of gold,
Sat and counted--and grew old.
And then one Tuesday night they found him
Dead--with his wishes piled around him.
And they counted the lot and found that not
A single one was missing.
All shiny and new--here, take a few
And think of Lester as you do.
In a world of apples and kisses and shoes
He wasted his wishes on wishing.

So, I'll keep my head up.
I have a WONDERFUL fiance after all.
and no matter what, we're gonna be fine.
We're gonna pull out of this.
We're gonna be okay.
But it's easy to forget that.
And that is grade A stupid.
Because right now, with him, I am the happiest I have ever been!
Why do so many things get in the way?
It'll all work out. :) right? Right. 


What To Expect

Tay and I saw a movie
What to Expect When You're Expecting
Rotten Tomatoes declared it rotten, but I undeclare that!
It really gives you a glimpse into real life.
Real, gritty, funny, sad, hopeful, life.

It was a great way for Taylor and I to reconnect.
Life has thrown a lot of curveballs at us lately...especially with family and money.
We suddenly have to live like....adults.
And in doing so, we forgot what's really important.
Everything will be fine if we have us.
The thing with this movie, is that every single one of the little families has a different, very real, situation.
A young girl with a miscarriage.
The perfect, beautiful, rich girl that has an incredibly smooth pregnancy..and you wanna hate her, but she's so nice to everyone!
The woman with the tough pregnancy, and an even tougher birth.
The woman that isn't blessed with the ability to have children, and so adopts.
And the woman that just wants everything to be perfect.
Every woman compares herself to others.
Every woman wants things to work out perfectly.
Every woman cries, and fights, and laughs.
And just so you know, I can still laugh with Taylor if we lived in a cardboard box.
Go see it.
It's really good.


Restaurant Records

There is something annoying about the world of serious dating/ being engaged.
Well...annoying AND great at the same time.
Here's the dilemma:
You spend every waking second with the one you love.
You get hungry.
You want to make food and save money and calories, 
BUT then you gotta be around people, and buy groceries, and have dishes and cooking utensils..and you don't wanna buy those, because in like 2 months you're gonna get lots of that shiz in the form of gifts!
So...what do you do?
You spend a lot of money.
Eat a lot of calories.
And eat out and out and out every single night of your life.
So, our wallets shrink, and our waistlines grow.
ANYWAY, being me, I have a few restaurant tales to tell.
Here's one of them!
(This intro may seem a little misleading, because the story doesn't actually involve Tay)
I went out with a friend and their family.
I didn't want to be rude, so I ordered a modest meal.
(they were paying.)
But they all got an appetizer, and a dessert with their meals!
I'm not a huge fan of desserts,
but when you're surrounded by them....well, you start to develop a lil' sweet tooth.
Obviously, this family is a lil' different.
I mean, they all got their own individual appetizers and desserts, but what's more?
They all went to the bathroom at the same time after dinner.
I know.
...and I still wanted dessert.
And then I saw it.
A little half-eaten dessert sitting all alone on a table :(
It was abandoned by someone! 
And so I did what any respectable, dessert-craving, person would do.
I ate it.
I ate someone's food.
Apparently, that's not the right thing to do.
I got stared down and left the restaurant in shame.
That's that.
Love y'all!


My New Job

As soon as I quit my old job, I got a new one!
Unfortunately, I don't get paid for it and it doesn't at all benefit society.
What is this job, you ask?
I'm a full-time Toddlers & Tiaras watcher.
Yes. Yes that is it.
You can call that show whatever you want!
Sick, sad, disgusting, but I tell you what,
dem girls are so dang cute!!!
And most of the time, they really like doing pageants and have a lot of fun!
Makes me wanna do pageants!
I could pull off a crown!
 But I guess I should continue my job hunt for something that actually pays.
I had an interview yesterday and one today!
Wish me luck :)
Also! If anyone wants to do a guest post for me or a giveaway, let me know!
I would LOVE to have you! :) :D <3


Gas Prices...

So here I am..
I really wanted to visit Tay today in American Fork for his lunch break.
Unfortunately, due to our poorness and the price of gas, I couldn't leave American Fork after his lunch.
The plan?
I was supposed to spend 4 hours in the library watching netflix and dorking around, then he would pick me up at five when he got off.
So, he dropped me off at the library annnnnnd
Netflix was blocked.
That's okay I can listen to music!
Pandora was blocked.
That's okay...I can read...
I picked a book that I had read when I was twelve and really enjoyed, but I guess my taste in books has changed in the past 8 years...go figure.

Now I was bored and sleepy, so I thought I would walk to Tay's work and our car down the street.
Turns out, down the street was actually 1 1/2 miles.
 It was windy as all get out!
My dress was blowing around threatening to show my unmentionables, my purse was constantly being blown off my shoulder, and my hair was whipping around so much that I couldn't see a thing.
I kept on going though. I just wanted to take a nap in the car!
Finally, Finally, FINALLY I got there.
I scrambled in the car and tried to get comfortable...it was really really hot.
I opened the window, and  unleashed the force of the wind.
:( didn't like that.
So, I did the next best thing!
Climbed in the trunk.
It was much cooler in the trunk, plus no one would judge me for sleeping in the car and my unattractive sleep face.
new owl earrings that my lovely stepmom so sweetly gave me!!!! :)
I played a few games on Tay's phone, and took a glorious nap!
I woke up to the phone ringing and someone getting into the car.
"Hi baby!"
"...where are you?"
"Are you in the trunk??"
And that was my day. 
Stupid high gas prices.


....So, Sup?

Well, hello!
I've been on a little hiatus and such for the past little while, but I'm back!
I hope...
Anyway, I had a lot of fun doing stuff and things!
Tay and I visited the hot springs
(which wasn't that fun in the hot weather...go figure.)
But it was still GORGEOUS!
My good friend and future sister-in-law gave me bangs!
I'm lovin' them :)
I drew a little thing for Tay, because why?
Oh nothing, he's just incredibly amazing and deserved just a litttttttle something. 
Funny unrelated story:
I don't work currently,
oh yeah, I don't work anymore, don't think I ever mentioned that.
There was a big mess at work, and it made me feel highly uncomfortable, so I quit.
But I still liked that job a lot. My favorite job so far. 
ANYWAY, I'm bored all day long while I search for a new job...so I texted Tay:
"Let's have a baby"
Of course I was kidding, although 4 episodes of Toddlers and Tiaras made the suggestion a bit more serious...
Well, Tay came home with a beautiful pink rose, and a card that said "It's a Girl"
I guess that'll do....for now.
Also, it's June.
Which means...
I get married next month!!!
And the last thing?
My friend Kelsey is doing a really saweet give-a-way!!
You should definitely check it out!
And follow her, because she's fun and sweet and awesome :)